I see London, I see France ...
The sheer clothing trend exposes more than fashion sense
By Erin Loomis 08/12/2010
I am a firm believer in the fact that underpants are embarrassing. At least in public. Especially in public. I really hate getting caught anywhere with my panties on display. There is nothing quite as mortifying as tucking your skirt into your tights, with the exception of having a wardrobe malfunction that includes a split seam in the backside of a pair of trousers. Especially if you don’t notice right away. My face turns red with humiliation just thinking about such revealing occurrences. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not ridiculously prudish, nor am I against watching television in my undies, or generally lazing about in them a la Homer Simpson on a hot day. I just don’t really feel like underpants have a place out there on the streets.
Underwear designers have spent decades modifying their designs so that they won’t be seen under clothing. Often the main task of an undergarment is to provide the illusion that it isn’t there. For centuries we have been modifying our silhouettes with various bizarre contraptions. Each era has its own individual, ever-changing concept of physical beauty, and the underwear industry has done it’s best to sculpt what nature didn’t, or just plain couldn’t provide. Corsets, bustles, hoopskirts, girdles, extra padded wonder water bras, control hose, spanks, and that elastic thing from TV that is supposed to smoosh away back fat are only the tip of the iceberg. The elimination of panty lines alone is practically a science. We’ve graduated from the old-fashioned granny panty to seamless thong, g-strings and other strange combinations to save the world from the horrific affliction that is the visible panty line. People have worked long and hard to help hide the fact that we wear stuff under our clothes. I appreciate them and their hard work, and as a staunch anti-panty line enthusiast and hater of public underpants, I salute them. Hip, hip hooray for the creator of the seamless panty! Hip, hip hooray for underwear so tiny it’s nearly useless! Hip, hip hooray for bras that don’t show under thin T-shirts!
With that in mind, it’s easy to see why this summer’s sheer clothing trend has me baffled. Sure, the fabrics are light, airy, beautiful and sheer, but the designers haven’t offered up much in the “how do I wear this without exposing my unmentionables” factor. In fact, they seem to be encouraging public humiliation.
“Here,” they say. “Wear this gorgeous sheer blouse with this equally gorgeous, equally sheer skirt, don’t you feel like the personification of summer?”
“Hey big wig designers, what about my underpants?”
I say, “Everyone can see them!”
“Get cuter underthings. They complete the look, nerd,” seems to be the response.
I get it. I just don’t like it. Much like the current throwback to the ’80s and ’90s “underwear as outerwear trend,” this trend rubs me the wrong way.
For those of us who love these new clothes and sleek fabrics, but are loathe to allow the world a glimpse of our undies, there is an option. Unfortunately this option can be slightly difficult to pull off and when done well can actually appear more provocative than having your underoos standing exposed for all to see.
The solution is nude camisoles, slips, underwear, or short shorts underneath the transparent or translucent garment. If the color of the undergarment is close enough to your own skin color the effect can really make the sheer garment appear sleek, sexy and gorgeous. It can also draw a lot of attention from people doing double takes because they think you are basically walking around naked.
Finding and choosing the correct nude for your skin tone can be difficult and often requires some trial and error. Remember that sheer fabric is finicky, and you should double check your underpants/outfit combination in a few different kinds of light before you venture out into the real world. If you are short on bright indoor lights, grab a friend or a full-length mirror and check out your look outside. Don’t forget to check from behind, as this angle tends to be the most revealing. For those brave souls who wish to use their undies as accessories, these checks are twice as important. Check all the angles to make sure that everything you want to keep covered stays that way when you hit daylight.
I’ve heard public indecency tickets are pricey as well as embarrassing.
If you want to try sheer clothes out this summer but are feeling nervous, start small. Layer a sheer top underneath a vest or cropped cardigan. You can also rock a bathing suit underneath a sheer dress at a beach barbeque or pool party. Dipping your toes into a trend is a good way to determine if you want to commit fully and dive in. It also prevents you from purchasing stuff you won’t ever wear.
So, if you are feeling saucy, throw caution to the wind and wear something see-through in public. Just make sure you aren’t wearing the incorrect day of your days-of-the-week panties. Exposed underpants are embarrassing enough. Being wrong about it being Wednesday to boot might be more than one person can bear.
Contact Erin Loomis at madeupbyloomis@gmail.com.
Underwear designers have spent decades modifying their designs so that they won’t be seen under clothing. Often the main task of an undergarment is to provide the illusion that it isn’t there. For centuries we have been modifying our silhouettes with various bizarre contraptions. Each era has its own individual, ever-changing concept of physical beauty, and the underwear industry has done it’s best to sculpt what nature didn’t, or just plain couldn’t provide. Corsets, bustles, hoopskirts, girdles, extra padded wonder water bras, control hose, spanks, and that elastic thing from TV that is supposed to smoosh away back fat are only the tip of the iceberg. The elimination of panty lines alone is practically a science. We’ve graduated from the old-fashioned granny panty to seamless thong, g-strings and other strange combinations to save the world from the horrific affliction that is the visible panty line. People have worked long and hard to help hide the fact that we wear stuff under our clothes. I appreciate them and their hard work, and as a staunch anti-panty line enthusiast and hater of public underpants, I salute them. Hip, hip hooray for the creator of the seamless panty! Hip, hip hooray for underwear so tiny it’s nearly useless! Hip, hip hooray for bras that don’t show under thin T-shirts!
With that in mind, it’s easy to see why this summer’s sheer clothing trend has me baffled. Sure, the fabrics are light, airy, beautiful and sheer, but the designers haven’t offered up much in the “how do I wear this without exposing my unmentionables” factor. In fact, they seem to be encouraging public humiliation.
“Here,” they say. “Wear this gorgeous sheer blouse with this equally gorgeous, equally sheer skirt, don’t you feel like the personification of summer?”
“Hey big wig designers, what about my underpants?”
I say, “Everyone can see them!”
“Get cuter underthings. They complete the look, nerd,” seems to be the response.
I get it. I just don’t like it. Much like the current throwback to the ’80s and ’90s “underwear as outerwear trend,” this trend rubs me the wrong way.
For those of us who love these new clothes and sleek fabrics, but are loathe to allow the world a glimpse of our undies, there is an option. Unfortunately this option can be slightly difficult to pull off and when done well can actually appear more provocative than having your underoos standing exposed for all to see.
The solution is nude camisoles, slips, underwear, or short shorts underneath the transparent or translucent garment. If the color of the undergarment is close enough to your own skin color the effect can really make the sheer garment appear sleek, sexy and gorgeous. It can also draw a lot of attention from people doing double takes because they think you are basically walking around naked.
Finding and choosing the correct nude for your skin tone can be difficult and often requires some trial and error. Remember that sheer fabric is finicky, and you should double check your underpants/outfit combination in a few different kinds of light before you venture out into the real world. If you are short on bright indoor lights, grab a friend or a full-length mirror and check out your look outside. Don’t forget to check from behind, as this angle tends to be the most revealing. For those brave souls who wish to use their undies as accessories, these checks are twice as important. Check all the angles to make sure that everything you want to keep covered stays that way when you hit daylight.
I’ve heard public indecency tickets are pricey as well as embarrassing.
If you want to try sheer clothes out this summer but are feeling nervous, start small. Layer a sheer top underneath a vest or cropped cardigan. You can also rock a bathing suit underneath a sheer dress at a beach barbeque or pool party. Dipping your toes into a trend is a good way to determine if you want to commit fully and dive in. It also prevents you from purchasing stuff you won’t ever wear.
So, if you are feeling saucy, throw caution to the wind and wear something see-through in public. Just make sure you aren’t wearing the incorrect day of your days-of-the-week panties. Exposed underpants are embarrassing enough. Being wrong about it being Wednesday to boot might be more than one person can bear.
Contact Erin Loomis at madeupbyloomis@gmail.com.
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