Dear Patti, My husband and I have been married for two years and Robert is seven years older than me. We met at work. He’s my best friend, my only family, and I know he loves me dearly. Most of the time he is wonderful to me, but every few months or so something sparks and he loses it. He gets crazy. Sometimes I’m the one that sets him off. Other times I don’t even know what triggers him; he just gets enraged. He might get in a fight with another man or turn on me. He has yelled,...Read More
Author: Patti Carmalt-Vener
Dear Patti, Approximately a month ago I applied for what I consider my dream job, even though I knew I was underqualified. Although I’d been in this business for over 10 years and had more than enough experience and training, I didn’t have the academic qualifications. Typically, this profession requires a master’s degree and I only have a high school education. Miraculously, I was able to show my knowledge and ability during the interview and was hired. I can’t express how thrilled I am to get this wonderful opportunity, but I start working next Monday and am scared. I...Read More
Dear Patti, I’ve been married for 17 years and don’t think I want to be married anymore. I haven’t really been in love with my husband for many years. Although I love him, my feelings have turned into a brotherly type of love. It seems like we have completely different visions for life and not much sexual or personal chemistry left; we merely exist under the same roof. If I sound unsure, it’s because I felt this same way four years ago and had an affair with a man who turned out to be an alcoholic. In the end,...Read More
Dear Patti, I don’t obsess about germs and cleanliness, have a washing/cleaning compulsion, constantly check to make absolutely sure my stove is turned off and my doors are locked, nor do I count, arrange and rearrange objects. However, my children and husband often make references that I’m suffering from OCD. I do like my home to be perfect. I don’t like crumbs left on counter tops, cupboards left open, dirty plates in the sink, or coats and jackets placed on chairs. I tell my family, “Clean the counter directly after you use it, shut open cabinets, put your dirty...Read More
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