Author: Patti Carmalt-Vener

Three typical phases of an abusive relationship

Dear Patti, My husband and I have been married for two years and Robert is seven years older than me. We met at work. He’s my best friend, my only family, and I know he loves me dearly. Most of the time he is wonderful to me, but every few months or so something sparks and he loses it. He gets crazy. Sometimes I’m the one that sets him off. Other times I don’t even know what triggers him; he just gets enraged. He might get in a fight with another man or turn on me. He has yelled,...

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Imagine how great your life can be with guided imagery

Dear Patti, Approximately a month ago I applied for what I consider my dream job, even though I knew I was underqualified. Although I’d been in this business for over 10 years and had more than enough experience and training, I didn’t have the academic qualifications. Typically, this profession requires a master’s degree and I only have a high school education. Miraculously, I was able to show my knowledge and ability during the interview and was hired. I can’t express how thrilled I am to get this wonderful opportunity, but I start working next Monday and am scared. I...

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Go slowly when weighing divorce after a long, unsatisfying marriage

Dear Patti, I’ve been married for 17 years and don’t think I want to be married anymore. I haven’t really been in love with my husband for many years. Although I love him, my feelings have turned into a brotherly type of love. It seems like we have completely different visions for life and not much sexual or personal chemistry left; we merely exist under the same roof. If I sound unsure, it’s because I felt this same way four years ago and had an affair with a man who turned out to be an alcoholic. In the end,...

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Two situations in which flexibility, understanding, compromise and responsiveness are important

Dear Patti, I don’t obsess about germs and cleanliness, have a washing/cleaning compulsion, constantly check to make absolutely sure my stove is turned off and my doors are locked, nor do I count, arrange and rearrange objects. However, my children and husband often make references that I’m suffering from OCD. I do like my home to be perfect. I don’t like crumbs left on counter tops, cupboards left open, dirty plates in the sink, or coats and jackets placed on chairs. I tell my family, “Clean the counter directly after you use it, shut open cabinets, put your dirty...

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THIS WEEK’S COVER

Upcoming Events

May
28
Sun
12:00 pm Lanterman Historical Museum Foun... @ Lanterman House
Lanterman Historical Museum Foun... @ Lanterman House
May 28 @ 12:00 pm – 4:00 pm
The Foundation hosts its annual Summer Whites Picnic and Ukulele Rendezvous from noon to 4 p.m. Guests are welcome to bring food and dine, admire the work of local artists and dance in the ballroom[...]
2:00 pm Stories in the Afternoon at Nort... @ Norton Simon Museum
Stories in the Afternoon at Nort... @ Norton Simon Museum
May 28 @ 2:00 pm – 3:00 pm
Stories in the Afternoon features the story “The Big Orange Splot,” which motivates Mr. Plumbeam to paint the house of his dreams, as guests imagine and draw their idea of a dream house, from 2[...]
4:00 pm Book Signing at Vroman @ Vroman's Bookstore
Book Signing at Vroman @ Vroman's Bookstore
May 28 @ 4:00 pm
Local Author Day presents Patricia Benke discussing and signing “Qudeen the Magnificent” and Priscilla Rose discussing and signing “The Future Belongs to Those Who Dare” at 4 p.m.
May
30
Tue
2:00 pm Coloring at Pasadena Public Libr... @ Pasadena Public Library, Villa Parke Branch
Coloring at Pasadena Public Libr... @ Pasadena Public Library, Villa Parke Branch
May 30 @ 2:00 pm – 5:30 pm
Kids are invited to spent the afternoon coloring and check out books with stories commemorating those who died serving in our country’s armed forces, from 2 to 5:30 p.m.
May
31
Wed
9:00 am Pasadena Sales Career Fair @ Hilton Pasadena
Pasadena Sales Career Fair @ Hilton Pasadena
May 31 @ 9:00 am – 12:30 pm
Pasadena Sales Career Fair @ Hilton Pasadena | Pasadena | California | United States
Southern California Professional Career Event – Sales & Management Specific Here at HireLive, we take a personal approach when working with both companies looking to hire and candidates in search of a career change. Our[...]

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